Sunday, January 18, 2009

Brief lucid flash

After years of no lucid dreams, now that I've been keeping a dream journal seriously for several weeks I finally had a brief moment of lucidity. I don't even know what triggered it--all of a sudden I just knew I was dreaming. I was in a white-washed room (someplace like Greece) with display shelves all around. The shelves held knit-covered pillows and scarves made of Angora wool, magenta and emerald and peacock blue stripes and blocks on white. The first thing I always notice when I become lucid is how beautiful and hyper-real everything looks; this time I reached out to touch the pillows and they felt incredibly soft. I rubbed my hands together and spun around to keep lucidity, and decided to go outside and fly--I was floating on my feet already--but then Jeremy rolled over in real life and bumped me just enough to pull me out of the dream. The lucid state is so fragile!

That brief taste of lucidity reminded me why I crave it--and why I get side-tracked into dream sex. Lucid dreams are the most intensely sensual experiences I've ever had, tied with the few times I took hallucinogens in the mid-80s. Both lucid dreams and LSD really do--for me--open the doors of perception. LSD brought gorgeous visions that didn't exist, but it did permanently sensitize me to subtle visual beauty; before it, unbroken woods were a sea of samey green, and now I see thousands of different shades. Lucid dreams are visions too, but they feel real--they feel like a way of seeing and feeling that could be accessible to me in waking life if I could find the switch. Lucid dream sex is sex with every nerve ending washed clean, experiencing sensation as though it's brand-new.

So I'll keep asking the dreams department of my subconscious for vivid dreams and for lucidity whenever possible. There are recommended exercises for reality testing while you're awake (so you'll be in the habit of doing them in dreams), but I've never been able to stick with them. Focusing on recognizing dream signs (naked in public, role in a play I forgot to rehearse, driving in impossible conditions, etc.) seems more promising.

5 comments:

Kirsten Monroe said...

Hi Helia,

This is so fascinating. I don't think I've ever had a lucid dream -- but it sounds like a portal into something amazing. It's funny because I often fight sleep. I want to keep going, don't want the day to end and pop up in the morning excited for it to be starting back up. Maybe some creative dreaming would help.

--KM

Jeremy Edwards said...

I rubbed my hands together and spun around to keep lucidity, and decided to go outside and fly--I was floating on my feet already--but then Jeremy rolled over in real life and bumped me just enough to pull me out of the dream.

Talk about getting bumped from a flight! Sorry 'bout that.

Jeremy Edwards said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jeremy Edwards said...

By the way ... Did I grind, too, or just bump?

Neve Black said...

Hi Helia,
I'm remiss in formally welcoming to our erotic gang - "Welcome to our erotic gang!"

Lucid dreams. Hmmm...interesting. The first thing I thought before continuing to read your post was, LCD. I've never done that before, but I seriously think tequila is a hallucinogenic (not kidding). I've had some crazy dreams after a few too many of that potent cactus derivitive.

Good for you for keeping a journal next to your bed. I have one of those too, because lucid or not, I often come up with the beginning, middle or end to a story while I'm in bed (insert laughter).

I'm looking forward to getting to know you better - welcome, welcome, welcome. :-)